Washington DC – BabyCostsMoney

We Get Around.

Published on December 20, 2017December 20, 2017 by Darlene Dee1 Comment

Toddlers have a lot of energy. SO. MUCH. ENERGY. It is exhausting. How on earth did I do this with TWO kids twenty years ago?!

Oh right. I was twenty years younger.

Babystar and I go on Little Adventures all the time. We love to take picnics to playgrounds, because picnics at playgrounds are free. But sometimes we have to switch it up.

We took Babystar to National Harbor for ice cream back when it was warmer (November because wtf is wrong with the weather). I spent $23.66 at Ben & Jerry’s and it all goes on the Toddler’s Tab because we wouldn’t have even gone if Babystar didn’t need to run out some energy. Parking was $12 and the playground was $7. Yes. National Harbor charges seven freaking dollars per kid to access to the playground. It’s such bullshit. They get away with it though, because they put a really cool carousel in the fenced in playground area. And the seven dollars comes with unlimited carousel rides. But still. Jerk move, National Harbor.

We paid $1 for a ride on the tiny carousel at Potomac Mills recently. We also paid $8 on that same trip to rent a gigantic fire truck shaped two person stroller thingy. I think we could have gotten fifty cents back if we had returned it but we left it at the door to the mall because we are terrible people. No. Wait. We are JOB CREATORS. Someone must make a living collecting those things, right?

We rode the train (AGAIN) at Springfield Mall. The mall trains are all $5, but it really cost $10 because the guy in the conductor hat at Springfield Mall charges for adults too. More bullshit. Springfield Mall also has a soft play room with a bunch of bouncy houses. Babystar was a bit scared, but I think she was just too young. We basically paid $7.42 for her to sit at the table with us and watch the big kids play. Whoops.

We went to Tyson’s Corner Mall recently and rode the train there too. The train guy only charged us $5 for Babystar and let me ride free, so there is still SOME kindness in this world.

We went back to Scramble today. ($10 plus $8.75 at the snack bar.)

We paid $11 to park at the zoo (member discount) to see ZooLights. And another $7 for the carousel that night.

Are you noticing a carousel trend? Last week, Babystar stopped nursing, and looked up at me and said, “I love milk. And water. And carousels.” And then went back to her milk business.

RAISING BABYSTAR: $24,672.98

NoVa’s Hottest New (Kids) Club.

Published on December 14, 2017December 13, 2017 by Darlene Dee10 Comments

Scramble is this winter’s hottest new (indoor kid’s) club. It has everything: a coffee shop made entirely of foam, a Big Ben boxing bag, a giant waving flag slide with both stars and stripes, a replica of the Sistine Chapel ceiling, cake pops, a hidden chamber with an Egyptian Mummy, and Space Balls. What are Space Balls? Its that thing where you take up all the space in a padded room with giant painted planets and then add a bunch of kids.

YOU GUYS THIS PLACE IS SO LIT. If you live in or near Northern Virginia, spend all of your cold winter days here. Scramble is HUGE. And it’s new, which means that at least for this season, it is CLEAN. It cost $10 per kid on weekdays and $20 per kid on weekends. One adult is free per kid. Extra adults are $5 each. So I paid $15 for Babystar, the Teenager, and I to get in last week. We have already been again, but I forgot my wallet and my friend paid. I’ll pay her back eventually, but right now that second visit is free and we are a family of vagabonds.

Anyway. Scramble. Apparently it is based off cool indoor play spaces in Europe. Maybe that’s why they went with an around the world (but mostly Europe tbh) theme.

Yes. I know that Sydney is not in Europe. It’s in Austria. Duh. 😉

Just LOOK at how cool this place is.

The smaller toddler play space is awesome enough. The big one with rocket ships and space balls and a secret passage is so big that adults can climb around in there quite comfortably. Although, to be fair, that is technically not allowed. But all the adults chase their kids through there and it’s basically fine. It’s also FUN! That slide is ON POINT.

Babystar went down the slide all by herself and she tells everyone. She’s so proud. She should be — look at that thing! I went down a whole bunch of times. It’s soupy* fun.

At one point, I counted at least ten adults chasing their kids through the play structure and the thing did not feel at all crowded at all not even a little bit. Freaking. Awesome. Plus, the snack bar prices are actually reasonable prices. I spent $5.75 for two cupcakes, one banana, and three drinks.

RAISING BABYSTAR: $24,444.46

*Babystar says soupy instead of super and literally nothing in the world is cuter. PLEASE NO ONE CORRECT HER.

Santa Baby.

Published on December 8, 2017December 8, 2017 by Darlene Dee10 Comments

December 7, 2017. Yesterday. AKA the day I met the REAL Santa Claus.

YOU GUYS, OMG!

Babystar is mildly obsessed with Santa this year. She loves his beard (just like Granddaddy, she says) and his reindeer and mostly his laugh. “Ho, ho, ho.”

She also knows that he will bring her a present. (I don’t get in to that whole if you’re good thing. Yet.)

Today we decided to go visit Santa at the nearest mall, which happens to be Pentagon City mall. The Teenager and I also booked free Aveda mini-facials because I really thought that Babystar would be all HELL NO when it was time to meet Santa.

I was incorrect.

Before we left, she wanted to find a present to bring him. At first, she wanted to bring him a strawberry smoothie. (Not even his own. She just wanted to share one with him.) The Teenager finished the smoothie (thank you darling daughter) so she had to find something else. On Wednesday, we made tons of salt dough ornaments, so she wanted to bring Santa some ‘decorations.’ She decided on a ‘heart’ and a ‘guy’ aka gingerbread man shape.

Y’all. I had no idea she was this fucking sweet. (Or this genius? Either her toddler heart is full of kindness or she’s stacking the Nice List in her favor.)

I mean, I knew she was sweet, but Bring-A-Gift-TO-Santa sweet? Amazing. #blessed

We went to see Santa and she gave him the ‘decorations’ and he asked her to help him put them on his Christmas tree.

She said she DID NOT WANT to go anywhere near his chair, and Santa was fine with it. He talked to her by the tree, and thanked her for the gift, and gave her a sticker in return. When she left, she said, “I love you, Santa.” And she wouldn’t put the sticker anywhere. She had to save it since “Santa gave it to me.” It is still unstuck, and I think we have to keep it for eternity.

Y’all. IT WAS A STICKER. All stickers immediately go SOMEWHERE. Not this one.

Please note: this wonderful man who is clearly the REAL Santa Claus hung out with Babystar even though she was NOT going anywhere near the picture bench. And the lovely photo people there let me take a few cell phone shots of them together since the mall camera didn’t turn that way.

Pentagon City Mall, you did it. You found him. Well done. If you are in the DC Metro Area, the real Santa is at Pentagon City. Shhhh. It’s a secret.

We left Santa Claus. The big girls got our facials. We all had some lunch. On the way out, Babystar decided to go say hi to Santa again. There was no line so I figured it was fine.

Her ornaments were still on the tree.

Santa showed her the ornaments, and then Babystar and Santa started chanting ‘HO HO HO’ to one another.

Babystar decided that she wanted to sit with Santa but not ON HIS LAP. (Obviously that was ok. We are all about consent.) Babystar wanted her sister with her, but she was really excited to be on SANTA’S CHAIR!

So. Yeah. I dropped fifty bucks ($52.98) on the cutest Santa picture ever. The package was $29.99 and the frame (yep) was $19.99. And now this pic (both of the girls!) is part of our official Christmas decorations. Right next to my firstborn at only nine days old on Santa’s lap in 1996.

Oh, you see that Santa hat she’s wearing? It is not a prop from the mall. Babystar BROUGHT IT with her so she could ‘match with Santa’.

Call 911. I’m dead.

RAISING BABYSTAR: $24,423.71

Plus a Flamingo.

Published on December 1, 2017November 29, 2017 by Darlene Dee2 Comments

And now for a tale of a teepee and a flamingo.

Anyone that has ever read this blog (THANK YOU FOR READING THIS BLOG!!) knows that I am mildly very much obsessed with Target.

So. The grandparents bought the adorable Pillowfort Gold Star Teepee for Babystar’s second birthday.

(If you are wondering, this teepee is HUGE. Which is super awesome if you have a playroom or you want a cute way to corral toys and give your kid a play area in your family room. It is less cool if you have a nursery the size of — well, the size of a teepee plus a changing table. Also, if you were wondering some more, the fabric is nice and thick like canvas. We loved it.)

Target has a 90-day return policy. On Day 103 of owning this teepee, a small child broke one of the thick dowel rods during a playdate. The child was aged two to five (we don’t really know who landed the kill shot). The manufacturer suggests this product for ages three and up. It should not have been broken so easily. Have they ever MET any kids age three and up??

To be fair, there was a knot in the wood where the dowel split, so it was likely weakened before the children started their Game of Destruction.

I took all of it to Target: the broken dowel, the non-broken dowels, the gold star fabric, a two-year-old child. And I asked for a new one. Or at least a new dowel.

The fine people at Target were AWESOME.

I had the receipt in an email (it was purchased online) so they knew I didn’t steal a giant teepee, break it, and try to pull a fast one. They couldn’t give me Target credit since it was past 90 days, but they DID totally break the rules and let me exchange the teepee.

But of course they didn’t have the gold star one in the store. And it HAD to be the gold star one. BabySTAR. Obvs.

So they gave me a brand new other-flavor teepee AND let me keep the gold star fabric from my old one.

And. AND. My receipt showed that the grandparents paid $89.99 but the teepee was currently selling for $79.99 so they couldn’t do the exchange unless I found ten more dollars worth of merchandise — but it had to be from the same department.

OH HAI MINGO! Babystar saw the pink flamingo and it was love at first sight. Mingo was a bit more than $10, so I paid $7.41 to exchange the teepee after the return window had passed AND bring home a new bff. Fair deal.

Mingo joins us on lots of adventures.

Um, plus I now have TWO teepees. I just need four dowel rods to make the second one. However, the teepees are giant, so I currently have ZERO teepees outside of a closet in the basement.

RAISING BABYSTAR: $23,224.17

Dinosaur Land.

Published on November 16, 2017November 14, 2017 by Darlene Dee12 Comments

You know that Salvador Dalí painting with the melting clocks?

Dinosaur Land in The Middle of Nowhere, Virginia is exactly like that. But with dinosaurs. Non-melting dinosaurs.

This place is amazing. I am a HUGE FAN. But it is clearly not, like, a research institution. Drive eighty miles east to the Smithsonian for that kind of dinosaur experience. Dinosaur Land’s target audience is obviously children. Or maybe Collectors of Odd Experiences. The dinosaurs are made of fiberglass that looks like paper maché. There are even little dinosaur families with dinosaur babies. But then there are BATTLE SCENES and dinosaurs eating other dinosaurs. WHAT. WHY.

Babystar said that one of the dinosaurs was sleeping. I went along with her version of events.

This place is an hour and a half away from D.C. in decent SAHM traffic. It is definitely worth a visit if you live within two hours of Dinosaur Land, because you won’t find many other places like this in your life. Admission is $5 for ages 2-10 and $6 for ages 11 and up. (I paid $22 for two adults and two toddlers. Then my friend bought the girls dinosaurs on the way out.)

Side note: my most favorite non-child-related SAHM perk is the LACK OF RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC. Highly recommend. Four stars.

Dinosaur Land is NOT worth a visit if you are simply visiting Washington D.C. for the monuments and museums. Dinosaur Land is a novel roadside attraction. Imagine that you live in the country and the old dude on the corner has a bunch of dinosaur statues in his backyard. Dinosaur Land is exactly like that. And approximately that size.

Oh, plus there is a giant King Kong and you can climb in his hand for a picture. And there is a giant shark that you can play in. BUT DON’T TOUCH ANYTHING ELSE.

If you do make the trek, take a friend. The drive is long and it helps if you can sing along to some 90s music on the way.

Also, take a picnic lunch even though you may NOT eat in Dinosaur Land. (Dinosaur Land is really big on rules.) Head west on Route 277 and there is a really cool park about five minutes away. Sherando Park has about a million picnic tables including a few shorty tables that are perfect for toddlers. There is a small playground that is toddler appropriate (but doesn’t have the baby swings). And just a short walk across the gravel road, there is a really cool FREAKING GIANT play structure that will give parents of toddlers a mini heart attack. But it DOES have baby swings. It also has a smaller toddler size play structure but why would any self-respecting two-year-old want to play on that when they can climb to the top of the world and almost fall but not fall and — oh, sorry. Everything’s ok.

Adults: make the climb and slide down the highest slide at Sherando Park. It is NO JOKE. Do it. You’re welcome.

We stopped at an adorable farmer’s stand on the way home and I bought a giant cookie for Babystar and a tomato that she poked her thumb into because toddlers love experiments. And a soda. ($4.25.)

RAISING BABYSTAR: $22,749.39