Baby’s First Gender Roles.

Can we talk about baby clothes for a minute?

I bought six shirts for Babystar at Target the other day. (But this is NOT just Target. It’s everywhere.)

These three tank tops were from the Baby Girl department. ($4 each.)

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These three t-shirts were from the Baby Boy department. ($7.99 each.)

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Baby boys don’t wear tank tops?

Baby girls don’t like Nirvana?

Someone please explain this to me. It can’t be the colors. Look at the teal and the rainbow on Pink Floyd and the yellow on the Nirvana tee. Baby girls don’t like space? Then why are there stars and planets on that tank top? Where is the Baby Clothes department?

Alright, I’ll give you dresses. But why buy a dress for a crawling baby anyway? It is cruel. Her knees get caught on all the extra fabric.

I have been shopping on the ‘baby boy’ sides of the stores since Babystar was born. That is where you find all the cute space pajamas and monster onesies and dinosaur hats. GIRLS LIKE SPACE AND MONSTERS AND DINOSAURS TOO.

I have been buying ‘baby boy’ pants for my chunky Babystar just to fit them over her legs. I know other moms who had to buy ‘baby girl’ pants to fit their skinny baby boys. Why on earth are 6-12 month baby girl pants so much smaller than 6-12 month baby boy pants?

In fact, the only division that makes sense is to have a Skinny Baby department and a Fat Baby department. Put the dinosaurs and the butterflies and the trucks and the rainbows in both.

I mean, really. Find me a baby girl that doesn’t like cars. Find me a baby boy that doesn’t like cupcakes.

RAISING BABYSTAR: $7,509.82

 

Riding in her Pink Cadillac.

Cruising down the street.

Waving to the girls. (And boys. And dogs.)

Feeling outta sight.

Spending all my money on a Saturday night. (And every night. And every day. Basically just spending all of the money all of the time.)

Babystar loved riding in the car down in Florida so much that we got one for home. $49.99 on sale at Babies R Us. Warning: CUTENESS OVERLOAD.

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Now we just need to get a matching one for Mama, right?

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RAISING  BABYSTAR: $6,505.17